So, I'm done with the compulsory well-wishing stuff and I can go back to incoherent whines and ranting about self, self, self, only myself. Or, not really. I'm putting some nail polish on my nails, to be exact, it's Chanel's 207 Barcelona Red, which looks rather vermilliony when freshly applied and changes to the exact shade of drying blood. I have to find the Killer Rabbit Lips lipstick to make the perfectly styled picture. I started a lame attempt for a fashion blog, by the way, but I'm not sure whether it doesn't suck, by chance. (You see? I'm superficial.)
Which leads me to the important matters: I broke my camera. I dropped it on the floor and now it's injured and not cooperating fully. No flash, borked electronics, so I'm stuck to my heaviest, bestest and most expensive lens which can be dealt with entirely manually. Pics take longer to take, they're messed up easier but when they're done well, they're done perfectly well. Since I'm at the office from dawn till dusk, not much of a problem in this season, don't expect too much colourful a content. Since I'm broke, broke to that extent that I'm not sure how I'll pay the bills, it has to wait until someday.
I was dusting the books a few days ago. This place is indeed slightly messy so I wasn't too surprised that I found a package of sleeping meds behind the Finnish-English dictionary. Upon closer scrutiny, I discovered that it's not ambien but antidepressants, some generic from the same company as my generic zolpidem, same design, different name. Since I had forgotten my psych meds in Prague and had only a few days worth, I started changing to the constantly angry and emotionally unstable older self but now I have my drugs back so I can be normal again. Did I mention that I found a new psychiatrist? Well, I did. He seems to be reasonable and rather a nice person. The bad thing is that it's two hours commute but after past experiences, I don't want a local shrink. Half of them are on my blacklist anyway, I've had quite a bit of history regarding a mental mess. (1)
Also, Tähti, with her usual regal dignity, so typical for Siamese cats, wishes for more belly rubs in 2001.
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(1) Should someone not be properly informed, I've been suffering from depressions on and off since I was 15 and I'm a sociophobic chickenshit even longer. It does odd and irrational things to me, generally rational and ordinate (cum grano salis) person. I however don't run around killing people, nor do I wear my (or someone else's, for that matter) underpants on my head.
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