Sunday, 10 May 2009

Codecs, expiration dates of potential brides et al.

It's generally known that I'm very lame when it comes to computers. Usually I grab someone computer-savvy and keep saying Make lappy work until they say Alright and now get lost. Lather, rinse, repeat as needed.
In here, I don't have anyone to grab and threaten so I have to manage myself - threatening someone on the internetz doesn't have that effect as angry yours truly. Well, last week I managed to download the codecs to make winamp work also on movies. V. sent me a pretty collection of movies - I told her to please skip anything with social issues, get me irony and lakes of blood, preferably well blended. So, I got almost complete filmography of Yasujiro Ozu. Well, fine, but first, I was once an avid movie-goer and I've seen it all, or almost. Most of his movies are about marrying daughters off (Include the shebang with inriguing aunties, worries that dear Jeanie may get too old to be a desirable wife etc.). And, second, I didn't want social issues. I hate social issues, they just are, and way too many to actually enjoy. Moreover, I was reminded of....

.... how a few years ago some schoolmates or someone like that - real close friends wouldn't dare (1) set up a date for me. With some type that studied math. Sure I sensed trouble but hey, why not, after all. Things went fine until I mentioned that I lived on my own in my own place. Then the guy made a dreamy face and started talking that it would rock, he would move to my place, he wouldn't have to pay rent, do the cleaning, cooking, laundry and dishes. It was so wtf that I didn't pour my coffee on his head - it would be a waste of good coffee anyway - and let him go on. I never saw him again. Obviously. Maybe he invented time machine and transported himself back to Middle Ages. Or someone hit him with something hard.

... and of my gracious mother who insist so much that I have time enough to 'settle down' (code phrase for marry and breed), that even if I wanted to have kids at 40, modern medicine can perform miracles on daily basis etc. that I'm absolutely sure that she has worries. When I told her to drop it because I don't intend to settle down, marry or breed, she told me to go to a shrink and get fixed because I'm broken because everyone wants to have bebehs. At least nobody wants me to go and check the son of that guy whose field is next to our field - but that's maybe because my family is aware of how I can yell (3). Now, I don't need understanding and I even don't insist on tolerance - as long as them people please shut up because I don't want their opinions either.

... and how I was returing from Laura's. With my straight-backed dancer's strut. Around San Lorenzo, I passed by two elderly guys who looked at me and one said E quella che distrugge (4). One of the bestest compliments I ever heard - too bad that message reached too late to the brain bit that does the thinking (5) and I didn't pause to ask what they meant. Still, better be scary than scared. And resonates nicely with my noms-de-guerre like Disturbance or Valkyrie (6).

Well, I know why I want movies I cannot relate to - I want to relax, darn. I have some historical fresco from Ukrainian history from O. Maybe there's some nice bloodshed.

(1) I have reputation.
(2) And even less I would want the rest of the package that includes a neat and pretty mortgage, house in the suburbs, regular holidays and other positives and social securities.
(3)... and throw thing, I know, I know, but hitherto I've done it only twice. Admittedly, once it was a cup of coffee but to my defense I need to add that the cup remained unhurt, that coffee is relatively easy to clean from the carpets and I had a REASON.
(4) "That's the one who destructs."
(5) It has a smartass name. I hear perfectly well but I process it slowly, usually the message reaches me when I'm done with asking what did the speaker say - or ten metres away.
(6) I never claimed I am a nice person. Apparently, there are indeed people who rightly imagine me not a nice wifey but someone who drags dead warriors into eternal pub brawl in heaven - and I love such people because I don't have to explain that I'm no damn fucking sweet fragile blonde girl however much they want to think so.

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